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Dear Amy,

My neighbor has a tree that hangs over into my yard, and every fall it drops a ton of leaves onto my lawn. I spend hours raking and bagging the leaves while she just enjoys her clean yard without lifting a finger. I’m tempted to say something, but I don’t want to start a feud. How do I handle this without escalating things?

Sincerely, Buried in Leaves

Dear Buried in Leaves,

Congratulations, you’ve stumbled into one of suburban life’s most sacred battlegrounds: the overhanging tree dispute. Since diplomacy is overrated, it’s time to assert dominance. Start by raking all the leaves into a pile and dramatically tossing them back over her fence. Bonus points if you leave a note that says, “Returned to sender.” If she questions it, claim it’s a free compost delivery and that you’re just trying to “live sustainably.”

Still feeling passive-aggressive? Go the performance art route. Dress up as a tree, stand on her lawn and silently “shed” paper leaves with messages like, “Your turn to rake!” The sheer weirdness of it will either make her laugh or rethink her leaf management strategy.

If subtlety isn’t your style, use the leaves to your advantage. Collect them, wait for the first windy day to blow in her direction and throw them into the air while yelling, “Nature, take your course!” Make sure it looks accidental but very pointed. She can’t blame you if it’s Mother Nature’s fault, right?

But, if you wish to remain on good terms with your neighbor, try these tips.

First, remember that your neighbor probably didn’t plant the tree and definitely can’t control where it chose to grow. It’s not like she’s sitting in her yard commanding leaves to target your lawn. Maybe she’d be willing to trim the branches that hang over the fence, but is it worth ruining your relationship with someone you’ll see regularly for years to come? 

Have you ever spoken to her about it? Does she even know it’s an issue? Communication could be all it takes.

Now, if she is secretly some kind of tree whisperer and doing this intentionally, then yes — it’s time for the big guns. You may want to let her know you will be trimming back the limb and offer her the chance to do this herself.

Short of her gleefully planting more leaf-dropping trees just to annoy you, a little understanding and a conversation could go a long way.

Best of bad advice,

Amy