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Dear Amy,

I recently joined a gym to get in shape, but I feel so self-conscious whenever I’m there. Everyone else looks like they know exactly what they’re doing, and I feel like I’m just fumbling around. How do I build confidence and stop feeling like the odd one out?

Sincerely, Awkward at the Gym

Dear Awkward at the Gym,

Confidence is all about faking it until you make it. The easiest way to stop feeling like the odd one out is to make others feel self-conscious. Strut in wearing a gold-sequined workout suit and carry a boom box blasting “Eye of the Tiger.” Take over the biggest machine in the room— bonus points if you pretend it’s broken and shout, “You’re welcome!” after “fixing” it.

If you’re not into theatrics, just assert your dominance by performing completely unnecessary exercises. Stand in front of the mirror and dramatically lift an invisible barbell while grunting loudly. Or spend your entire session walking from machine to machine and inspecting them like a gym critic. Offer unsolicited “tips” to the most shredded person in the room — nothing builds confidence like being absolutely wrong but acting like a pro.

Still feeling awkward? Go the sympathy route. Put on a neck brace and tell people you’re recovering from a highly specific injury, like “extreme parasailing.” This not only makes you stand out, but people will start rooting for you. Bonus: no one will expect you to actually do anything strenuous!

If you’re up for a technique that is sure to work, remember everyone starts somewhere, and most people at the gym are too focused on their own workouts to notice what you’re doing. If you’re unsure about equipment or routines, consider asking a trainer for help or watching tutorials online. Start with exercises you feel comfortable doing and gradually build your confidence. 

A healthy exercise program is about impressing anyone else. It’s about improving your overall health and wellbeing so just focus on your progress.

Best of bad advice,

Amy